“The Plus One Method”
What if you are transitioning back to the workforce after staying home with children? That changes the narrative of the plus one method. It is easy to get lost in the day-to-day responsibilities of parenthood. And if we can be honest, we can get lost in the shuffle. Our perspective and what we desire out of employment can change. And our community can also change. And the real kicker is, we may not be able to define ourselves anymore. Imagine yourself navigating through your daily routine. How many people do you communicate with? Which conversations stand out to you? Outside of being the world’s best parent what really brings you joy? Or makes you excited? Or sparks fear? Not the type of fear where something is going to jump out at you. But the type that challenges you to step outside of your comfort zone to achieve something incredible. That’s the Plus One Method I want to share with you.
About Shanika
I’ll never forget when my son was in kindergarten and I ran into some health complications. I was a single mom, stressed enough as it was, and then had to have open heart surgery to save my life. I was only 25 years old. No one tells you how tough motherhood can be, and they certainly don’t warn you at the hospital before sending you home that taking care of a five year old while recovering from open heart surgery isn’t going to be a breeze.
When I went to my support system, I heard the same sentiment again and again. They said I should be grateful to be alive. While their sentiments were well intentioned, the guilt poured in.
It’s not that I wasn’t grateful, I was! But couldn’t I also be physically and mentally exhausted? Couldn’t I be physically present but mentally somewhere else and need a little help navigating that situation without feeling like I was being selfish or ungrateful?
I founded the Ministry of Mom because it’s everything I needed from the time my son was born to the time I was recovering from surgery, and even now as I’m raising a teen. It’s a space to share without feeling shamed. A space to not only not feel judged, but also to have other moms say, “You’re not alone, I feel that, too.”
What started as a Facebook group where we shared recipes, stories, and parenting tips, has evolved into a real community of support and togetherness. We are young and new moms, we are not so young and experienced moms, and we even have some grandmothers among us. Because the need for support from other moms never goes away. Especially when you’re balancing your career and motherhood simultaneously — we need all the help we can get. And let me say it loud and clear… it’s okay to ask for help, and you deserve to feel heard and to have help building the tools to navigate this life.
